Posted by Fitz

In honor of the holiday season, I’d like to give you a gift and ban an overused phrase from every mom’s vernacular: “I am such a bad mom.” 

I’ve been hearing my friends say it all of the time lately, whether it’s warranted or not.  One friend thinks she’s a bad mom because her kid hasn’t eaten veggies in a week, another thinks she’s the worst mom because her baby took a fall when she dared to look elsewhere for thirty seconds.  Let’s introduce another, cruder, phrase to replace “I’m such a bad mom”:

Shit happens.

We’re all going to make mistakes, no matter how hard we try to be the best moms/wives/CEOs of the house/workers that we can be.  Something is always going to have to give, and we have to give permission to ourselves to say, “Hey, I’m not a bad mom because Davy hasn’t gotten a bath in three days – I’m just preventing his skin from drying out!”  Cut yourselves a break, women, and remember that you’re doing the best you can with all of the resources, constraints, and responsibilities that make up the crazy lives that we lead as mothers.  It’s okay to have to focus on other things once in a while, it’s okay if accidents happen on your watch, and it’s okay for you to let go of the guilt you may feel for real or imagined transgressions.

Go and live your lives, and be the best moms you can be.  You’ll exceed expectations in some areas and probably fall short in others.  You accept that in other areas of your lives, so accept it in motherhood.  Your kids will still love you, and know that you’re doing your damndest to raise them well.

Now, go forth and conquer!