Posted by AVM

It’s amazing how a sane, normally mild-mannered woman can be reduced to an irrationally angry beast when her child is “threatened” by another child.  Yes, that’s right.  I’m 36 and the offender is 3, 4, even 6, or 7, and I want to string them up by their thumbs.   Pin them to a wall and point a serious finger in their faces and hiss, “If you ever go near my daughter again, I’ll kill you, you little brat.”  Is that rational?  Not even close.  But the Mama Bear in me ignites, and I find that an internal raging monologue runs rampant when these instances happen.

My daughter is not an angel all the time – no children are.  I get that.  But when she’s not, especially where other children are involved, I step in.  I am not one of those mothers who thinks her child can do no wrong.  I have seen the push and pull and the grabbing of which my daughter – and any three-year-old – is capable.  “Lovey, we share our toys.”  “Lovey, if you’re not nice to your friends, we’re going to have to go home.”  “Lovey, go say your sorry, right now.”  Things like that.  How else is she supposed to learn right from wrong? Boundaries.  They are a necessity.

Here’s a scenario that happened recently to us.  At a classmate’s outdoor birthday party, I was pulling Lovey and another little girl around in a wagon.  The girls were having a blast being pulled by me, around and around the yard.  After about 5 minutes, a little boy who was rounding four-years-old, came up to the wagon and grabbed my daughter’s shirt and started pulling her out of the wagon while proclaiming, “It’s MY turn to ride! You have to GET OUT.”  Red.  I saw red.  What I wanted to say was, “Get your bleeping hands off my daughter, kid, before I pummel you.”  What I actually said was, “We don’t grab people’s clothes, Jake.*  Please let her go, ok?   It’s the girls’ turn now, and after that your mommy can pull you around in the wagon.”  I looked up and saw his oblivious mother on her cell phone, chatting away.  That made me even more irate.

Maybe I’m being hard on Jake, his mom, and the whole situation. Maybe. Yet, when something like this happens, it’s a reality check for me of how irrational I can be where my daughter is involved.  I wonder if I’ll always be like this.  My Lovey must fight her own battles. . .  in a couple of years.  For now, I’m Mama Bear.

*names have been changed to protect the guilty