Undersea Kingdom Party

Number of times I've been invited to a party themed "Undersea Kingdom": 1

Posted by Duff

Number of would-have-been-work-days that I’ve been a stay at home mom:  70

Number of children I have: 2

Number of times I clean the high chair each day : 5

Number of times I clean the kitchen (daily): 3, sometimes 4

Percentage of days The Dervish gives me a hard time about getting up, eating, dressing, or leaving the house: 94

Percentage of days Atticus awakens early and raring to go: see above

Number of days  both children have napped, and at the same time: 2

Number of days The Dervish hasn’t gone to time out as day stretches into evening: See above

Number of antibiotic courses started and/or completed: 5

Number of times I thanked my lucky stars I didn’t have to call in to work to care for a sick child: See above

Number of times The Dervish has tried, unwittingly, to off  her little brother: 435

Number of times per day when at least one child is crying: 7

Number of times per day I’m now certain that two is enough children for me:  (there is sophisticated calculus to be done here, and I can’t do it. It’s greater than 7)

Number of days I’ve missed my former job: 0.25 (Though I do miss many of my former colleagues)