Posted by Fitz

People tell you so many things when you’re pregnant with your second child, and none have rang more true to me than how the arrival of a tiny infant will make your first born seem so grown up.  I will admit that I put no stock in these comments, thinking it would be difficult to change my perspective of my Bean, who I kissed goodbye through tears right before my delivery and kissed again just several hours after.  What could change in such a short amount of time?  At first nothing seemed to be different – she was my Bean, plain and simple.  Five weeks later, however, that all has changed.

My perspective on my beloved Bean has grown slowly.  First, it was a quick comparison to how grown up her painted toenails seem in comparison to Sweet Pea’s barely visible ones.  Then, I found myself staring at her feet and hands, wondering when they got so…substantial.  Kids’ hands, not baby hands…made for running and creating and trying to give me very painful, yet so-called bootiful, ponytails after dinner every night. 

What really changed my lens about my Bean, though, just happened last night.  Sweet Pea has fussy time at night, and the three of us who aren’t fussy have a tendency to look at each other like, “What do we do now?”  The Bean is always careful to make sure her little sister has her paci (and tells her to “Be nice!” when the baby spits it out), but last night she turned my heart into mush.  She took her giraffey, the buddy that she prizes above all other things, and laid it next to her sister for comfort so “she’d feel all better with a friend”.  Add that poignant moment to my peak hormonal state and I’m not ashamed to say it took a good fifteen minutes for me to stop crying.  In that time, my Bean grew from my little baby to my best big girl.  It was one of the most wonderful, touching moments of my life.

Oh, and Sweet Pea stopped crying immediately once she had the giraffe.  She must have been blown away, too.